Ask Cherry: 2010 The Break-Up (Why Not a Whore revisited)

This year I'm doing things a little different. Today it's less "Ask Cherry" and more Cherry telling you how it is lol. I've decided not to let format interfere with my message...

2010 has OFFICIALLY become the "Year of the Break-up" I've seen relationships falling apart left and right. If Brad and Angelina can't make it, who's gonna marry my crazy sexy, cool ass? Year after year I watch my girls and other women fall prey to the same old nonsense and so recent an old blog I wrote and then reposted many Cherry moons ago on other blog sites keeps ringing in my ears. It's been on my heart for a week or so. I guess that means I'm supposed to share it again so here it is with some updates... Enjoy!:

I dunno if you watch Nip/Tuck, but a few years ago they had a PHENOMENAL episode that really shined a bright light on my life and a lie I'd been living. You know how sometimes a show can like illustrate your worst fear, or maybe show you a truth you didn't wanna know... yeah, it was one of those episodes.

Dr. Christian Troy, plastic surgeon... for those unfamiliar with the show (why aren't you watching?!?! GET WITH IT!) he's the guy every man wants to be: super arrogant, crazy cocky, paid out the ass, completely pampered. He's always finds himself in some ridiculous sexual escapade. He's had mother/daughter threesomes, foursomes, co-eds, milfs, muff divers, name it he's been there. He's also the biggest jack ass you've ever seen. He slept w/ a big girl but made her wear a bag on her head... no literally I big brown paper bag... Yup he's the type of guy all women fall for at one time or another.

So, he's had this off and on relationship with this chick Kimber who's an off and on porn star. They're both equally fucked up, but somehow Christian always manages to screw Kimber over. Every time she leaves him and kinda gets her life together, he squirms his way back in. They've been engaged, married, and everything in between. He always goes in on this whole long thing about being in love with her and how he wasn't for monogamy but could be with her, "you complete me" the whole shpeel. Then about two episodes later he always manages to shit on that commitment.

One season Kimber REALLY got it together. Okay, so she's become a scientologist... BUT she was content with her life.

Christian on the other hand fell in love with this one chick then fucked it all up by being his jack ass self. So what does he do next...

That's right, he runs right to Kimber's house... no literally the same damn day. He shows up drunk off his ass and looking pitiful. So of course she lets him in.

He says he needs her help. He figured maybe if Scientology helped her then maybe it will work for him. He said all the things that sounded like he was ready to make a change in his life. He was so helpless and in need. Then he pushed up on her, gave her the "I know you want me. Don't you still think about me?...blah, blah, talk panties off, blah"

So Kimber gives in, they're having stapelton sex...

Cut to after. Kimber is lounging all happy on the couch. She walks to the bedroom and slides into the nook, looking all fulfilled and happy and says "let's just lock ourselves in and order takeout and make love all weekend", Christian says no, he has to go to work. Kimber makes a second offer to meet up with him at her church.

Christian gets up to get dressed and says "are you fucking kidding me? I'm not going to some wacko bullshit!" She gets that confused look like "but you said..."

Here's the priceless part:

Christian cuts her off, "I said what I always say... whatever it takes to get laid." (jack ass smirk on face)

Kimber retorts, "How can you be so cruel! Why come to me?!?!? Why not just fuck one of your whores!!!!?!?!?"

His response (this made me cringe), "Whores?, they just give you their body. I needed more than that. I needed to feel like the most important thing in the world. So I came to you."

She then proceeded to smack the shit out of him and he kinda laughed her off and threw her on the bed and walked out...

###

Now, most dudes have NO WHERE NEAR the balls to say some shit like that and be that straight forward and blunt with someone...

HOWEVER, damned if that shit didn't ring true some where. I actually had to change the channel cause it really disturbed me. I had to stop and think... is that why me?

I've had so many of my female friends come to me with "why?"

Why did he lie?

Why does he play with my feelings?

Why does he always come back to me if he doesn't want to be with me?

If he had a girl, was in love with her, was not interested, was not feeling me, if I wasn't the one, if I wasn't his type, if I wasn't x, y, or z?

Is it because we loved them? Is it because we made them feel loved and they knew we'd give it to them without knowing for sure we'd get it in return? Are they just using us?

And though I know it's been said a million times, a million ways, seeing it like that... it was never truer.

... damn.

In 2010 I've made myself a promise to never again be the victim of men who are emotional vampires. Yep, VAMPIRES. They will suck you dry and leave you for dead. We can't blame it all on them either. I've gone right up to Dracula's crypt in my best stilettos, opened a vein and yelled "take me now!" We have to start being emotionally responsible. You know that nucca is FULL OF SHIT! STOP IT!

If a dude asks you to do something that sounds irrational, DON'T DO IT!!! He wants you to fly home w/ him to some island and meet his momma but doesn't want to define your relationship... get that man's fangs out of your heart and WALK AWAY! His gramma dies and he calls you and not his girlfriend and wants to come cry on your coochie couch... say I'm sorry for your loss and LOCK YOUR DOORS!! I'm not saying it's all your fault but there is nothing you or I or any anyone else can do to turn a boy into a man and get him to stand on his own two feet emotionally (yeah I said it!).

We can only control our actions so in 2010, I say let's get on trend and break-up! I'm all for it! I'm all for the end of situationships, giving too many benefits to dudes who are posing as your friend, and being the emotional cornerstone to man whose house you can't even spend the night in.

Now, let's hear some comments people! I want the good the bad and the ugly. Do you agree? Men, you're thoughts? I know you're reading, I get your emails but let's make this interactive. Get yourself and pseudonym and get to commenting!!!

- Cherry