Silent, but deadly...Horror story 1: It's 2am, you're too horny to sleep and neither hand is quite doing the job. You reach for a toy but at this oh so silent hour of the night it sounds more like a buzz saw than a bullet.
Horror story 2: "Mmmmmm... oooooooh... yes... almost... WHAT THE F!?!?!" (vibrator slows to a slow rumble and then gives out) "Great! What else in this house has AA batteries?!"
Both situations suck (sadly not literally)!
Here's a solution: The Elise
This pretty purple pleasure giver is one of the more reasonably priced items available from the bougie skanks over at Lelo. With a retail price of $169, I know I may get a few side-eyes for calling this "reasonably priced" but in comparison to her $10,500, 18k gold-plated cousin Inez; Elise is a cheap date.
What makes her worth it?
- A moaner not a screamer... Elise is whisper quiet.
- Plug it in... it has a rechargeable ion battery and comes with an AC adapter.
- You break it, they fix it... if you've ever broken a great toy (hey, it happens) you know how awesome a 1yr warranty is.
- Double your pleasure... there are two separate vibrating points in the shaft that work in harmony to deepen your experience.
- The bitch is fly... look how sleek and smooth she is; classy not trashy!
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"Elise" sounds great! But girl, I'm still buggin' off the $169!!! Hmmm...I'll take your word for it for now and put it on my wish list ;-)
ReplyDelete@Anonymous - Yeah it's pricey but you get what you pay for. Last two toys I bought cost me around $30 a piece. One fell out of the bed one night, hit the floor and the battery part cracked. The other one, after about a year the outer layer got a crack in it. I'm assuming it dryed out or something... I figure at least Elise has a warranty :)
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